Scialocco

April 29, 2010

Io sto con Tintin

Filed under: πόλις [polis],Newspeak — Shylock @ 9:44 PM
Tags: , , , ,

Fumetto ottantenne
accusan di razzismo:
l’ultima delle strenne
del policorrettismo.
Allora, poche seghe:
per l’african tormento
dei bianchi come streghe
chiediam risarcimento.

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April 27, 2010

Paparatzinger

Filed under: oppio dei popoli,sana follia — Shylock @ 3:40 PM
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“Abort is scorrect
but allor pur the priest who inkiappett.”

April 26, 2010

‘A merda succiede (Shit Happens)

Filed under: Collateral Poetry,sana follia — Shylock @ 7:24 PM
Tags:

Me so’ magnato er titolo
da Testaccio al Gianicolo
è l’urlo di Ranieri
(dopopartita, ieri).

April 25, 2010

Scouting for Boys

Filed under: Collateral Poetry,Poetic Justice — Shylock @ 10:35 PM
Tags: ,

Main Entry: scout
Pronunciation: \ˈskau̇t\

intransitive verb

1 : to explore an area to obtain information (as about an enemy)
2 a : to make a search b : to work as a talent scout

Scouting for Boys: quando il titolo tutto
già spiega è galeotto, o farabutto
chi dice di educare i Lupetti
ma solo s’interessa ai lor culetti?

CONTINENCE

Smoking and drinking are things that tempt some fellows and not others, but there is one temptation that is pretty sure to come to you at one time or another, and I want just to warn you against it.

You would probably be surprised if you knew how many boys have written to me thanking me for what I have written on this subject, so I expect there are more who will be glad of a word of advice against the secret vice which gets hold of so many fellows. Smoking and drinking and gambling are men’s vices and therefore attract some boys, but this secret vice is not a man’s vice-men have nothing but contempt for a fellow who gives way to it.

Some boys, like those who start smoking, think it is a very fine and manly thing to tell or listen to dirty stories, but it only shows them to be little fools.

Yet such talk and the reading of trashy books or looking at lewd pictures are very apt to lead a thoughtless boy into the temptation of masturbation. This tends to lower both health and spirits.

But if you have any manliness in you, you will throw off such temptation at once. You will stop looking at the books and listening to the stories, and will- give yourself something else to think about.

Sometimes the desire is brought on by eating food that is too rich, or from sleeping in too warm a bed with too many blankets. It is a help at times such as these to take a cold bath or shower, or exercise the upper part of the body by arm exercises, boxing, etc.

It may seem difficult to overcome the temptation the first time, but when you have done so once it will be easier afterwards.

If you still have trouble about it, do not make a secret of it, but go to your father, or your Scoutmaster, and talk it over with him, and all will come right.

April 24, 2010

Sana fobia

Filed under: πόλις [polis],Newspeak,oppio dei popoli — Shylock @ 5:34 PM
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Uno ne sgozza per educar cento
nell’incuter terrore di Maometto
ammettere bisogna ch’è un portento
per multicultidioti è sol ‘rispetto’
d”islamofòbia’ tosto mi lamento
in senso materiale poi t”accetto
la religion la plus con la chiamava
Houellebecq e forse non sbagliava.

April 22, 2010

Gilgamesh

Filed under: πόλις [polis],Newspeak — Shylock @ 5:20 PM
Tags: , , ,

Allora anch’io fui già garibaldino
a Quarto m’imbarcai con altri Mille
fino al Volturno feci gran faville
lo crederebbe chi non è cretino?
Eppur si dicon tanti ‘partigiani
che mai menaron mani su in montagna
e Bella Ciao ripeton come lagna
senza che alcun li chiami ciarlatani
né loro né quei ‘profughi’ farlocchi
che non fuggirono da Palestina
e benché mai l’abbian veduta prima
moltiplicali l’Onu qual pidocchi
vive Enkidu e per sempre con noi lotta
non credeci sol figlio di mignotta.

April 20, 2010

You’ll Never Wank Alone

Filed under: oppio dei popoli — Shylock @ 8:31 PM
Tags: ,

Dice che lui non mi sente mai solo
ed io da carognone senza uguale
che prende sempre l’occasione al volo
chissà perché mi vado a pensar male.

April 17, 2010

Posthumous Shame

Abbisognava? No, ma tu già anziano
servile encomio desti a psiconano
rimàn della discreta tua carriera
quella la pagina certo più nera
come umorismo tuo è detto inglese
così il commento che ti fa palese:

Adding comments has been disabled for
this video.
I wonder why: do you?

Facile prevedere che sinceri
dal cor degli internauti gli improperi
sarebbero sgorgati: la scenetta
col ghigno della complice sciaquetta
risulta scientemente costruita
affinché buona fede sia carpita.
Quale Céline che i nazi in ritirata
segue, così m’appare tua porcata
almeno lui rimane un grande artista
tu solo un ruffian cabarettista.

April 16, 2010

O-sten-siò-ne, s.f.

Filed under: oppio dei popoli — Shylock @ 2:36 PM
Tags:

Circonvenzione d’incapaci
organizzata da rapaci.

April 13, 2010

Il Labour ce l’ha duro

Filed under: Collateral Poetry,πόλις [polis] — Shylock @ 3:17 PM
Tags: , ,

Mi chiamerà Giovanni ancor ‘leghista’?
Risponderogli: sono laburista:

We are committed to an
immigration system that
promotes and protects British
values.
[…]
Our new Australian-style points-
based system is ensuring we
get the migrants our economy
needs, but no more. We will
gradually tighten the criteria
in line with the needs of the
British economy and the values
of British citizenship, and step
up our action against illegal
immigration. There will be
no unskilled migration from
outside the EU. Skilled jobs are
now advertised here first for
four weeks with more vacancies
going to local workers, and
public procurement will in
future give priority to local
people. The points-based
system will be used to control
migration with limits for high-skilled
workers and university
students. As growth returns
we want to see rising levels of
employment and wages, not
rising immigration.
We recognise that immigration
can place pressures on housing
and public services in some
communities so we will expand
the Migration Impact Fund,
paid for by contributions from
migrants, to help local areas.
We know that migrants who
are fluent in English are more
likely to work and find it easier
to integrate. So as well as
making our English test harder,
we will ensure it is taken by all
applicants before they arrive.
Local councils and other public
services should keep funding
for translation services to a
minimum. Many public-sector
workers are already required
to meet minimum standards of
English; we will build on this to
ensure that all employees who
have contact with the public
possess an appropriate level of
English language competence.
Because we believe coming
to Britain is a privilege and
not a right
, we will break
the automatic link between
staying here for a set period
and being able to settle or gain
citizenship. In future, staying
will be dependent on the pointsbased
system, and access to
benefits and social housing will
increasingly be reserved for
British citizens and permanent
residents – saving the taxpayer
hundreds of millions of pounds
each year. We will continue
to emphasise the value we
place on citizenship, and the
responsibilities as well as rights
it brings, through the citizenship
pledge and ceremony, and by
strengthening the test of British
values and traditions.

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